Having a new baby is wonderful! It’s exciting, you’ll be in awe of your new bundle of joy no matter if it’s baby number one or ten! But the healing, caring for a new baby (also other children and the home), hormonal imbalance, and sleep deprivation will drive many women near a breaking point. That’s why various research show one in seven mothers go through postpartum depression (ppd). Alhamdulilah I’ve never had severe postpartum depression, but I’ve experienced being overwhelmed. I was tired, emotional, and exhausted.
I had another baby not too long ago and I’m so thankful to Allah; after having this baby, I’ve avoided feeling overwhelmed much better this time around then the previous times I gave birth. That was because I focused on doing one main thing: I Read my adhkaar and made lots of tasbeeh!
When we are not praying due to menses or postpartum bleeding, we can forget to make daily duas or recite Quran or even remember Allah the entire 40 days we’re waiting to pray again. This will make us more vulnerable to shaytan’s whispers; shaytan’s whispers can make us more agitated, restless and depressed—feelings and emotions a lot of women develop after giving birth.
Even when I wasn’t praying Salah, I made sure to still recite my morning and evening duas every day. This helped me tremendously. I believe the more we remember Allah through duas, tasbeeh or reciting the Quran, the happier and calmer we are in our daily lives. I wasn’t reading Quran daily after I had my baby, but I recited lots of other duas daily.
There are so many duas to recite, one of the greatest is narrated by Abu Dawood and At-Tirmidhi:
‘Bismillah illadhi la yadurru ma’a ismihi shay’un fi’l-ard wa la fi’l-sama’ wa huwa al-samee’ ul-‘aleem (In the name of Allah with Whose name nothing can harm on earth or in heaven, and He is the All-Hearing, All-Knowing)‘, which we should recite three times every morning and evening.
If you don’t have the time or the energy to recite the entire daily-prescribed duas, at least recite the dua above.
Besides remembering Allah, here are a few others that gave me relief from some of the exhaustion that comes with having a new baby:
*When family and friends offered to help me in any way they could, I happily accepted. This helped me to relax and focus on my recovery and taking care of my baby.
*I drank a lot of water, ate oatmeal and soups and anything else I thought would increase my milk because I wanted to produce enough milk. It can be stressful to not have enough milk for the baby. So I tried to avoid any milk production issues as much as possible.
*Slept as much as I could. Sometimes you just gotta put your sleep and well-being before doing housework.
*Enjoyed and still enjoy caring for my baby. This is such a precious stage that they grow out of so fast. I enjoy him right now in his infancy stage. Holding my baby makes me so happy along with spending time with the rest of my children.
*Being grateful to Allah! No matter how sleep deprived or exhausted I am, I always thank Allah for the uncountable blessings in my life especially my wonderful babies.
If you’ve had a new baby or are due to have one soon, I hope some of the things that have worked for me work for you as well.